JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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