carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize