And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize