Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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