when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
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I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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