I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
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dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
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