I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
is that a dick in a sweater?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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