How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize