dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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