dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize