I CAN MOONWALK!
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
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He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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