the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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