Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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