Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
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I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
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I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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