Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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