There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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