I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize