There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I believe in your delicious
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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