Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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