I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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