I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize