He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
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Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
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So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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