I must be too annoying 4 u.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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