think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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