I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize