States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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