I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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