hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize