I wannas sexs uuuuu
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize