Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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