Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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