You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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