My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Your dad touched me again.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
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So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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