Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Can vaginas get frostbite?
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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