i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
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Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
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I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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