He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize