Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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