i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize