We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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