u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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