I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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