In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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