I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize