im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
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