Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
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