Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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