her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
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Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
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