Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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