Midget sex pt 2 tonight
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
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i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
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I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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