How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
only you would photoshop your dick
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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